Domestication Update: Buttons be Damned!

When I started this blog, it was to document my forays into becoming something like a wife, rather than the bachelorette/feral cat I had been for most of my life. I'm happy to report that I've progressed from a real fear of raw meat to making meatloaf, and from a I'll-buy-new-underwear-to-avoid-laundry situation to a regular laundry schedule. Heck, I even put my laundry away!

But all that progress came to a head last week when I was reminded just how far I have to go. I was brought to my knees when I realized ... drumroll, please ... I still don't really know the right way to sew a button.

 

This is a shank button. Instead of having two or four holes, it just has a loop in the back. This makes it inherently a little flopsy, and the likelihood it will fall off (especially if sewn on by tiny Malaysian children) is high.

My hubby was in a rush the other day and had to dress nice. You can imagine my panic when one of his buttons popped off and I had to frantically fix the problem. I realized, HOLY CRAP. I still don't know how to sew on buttons! 

Obviously, I get the basic idea, but I never know how to knot it or how to tie off or how to be sure it's really on there for good. I ran around like a chicken with my head cut off, hunting down my Martha Stewart Encyclopedia of Sewing and dammit if that bitch didn't even have a paragraph about sewing buttons by hand! I think she thinks I'm supposed to know this stuff or something?! Sean suggested I YouTube it and I waved away his suggestion, muttering, "No time! NO TIME!"

Long story short, I frantically just started sewing, got that bad boy back on the jacket and managed to get my husband out the door without looking like he was a laid off bank executive living in a Hooverville.

It was a good reminder that despite all the progress I've made, I still have lessons to learn. Oh, and if you're curious, here's how you sew a shank button:

The good news is, that's close to what I did, operating purely by instinct. Whew!